UNCOVERING THE IDENTITY OF MY DONOR : PART 2

In late September 2017, I was baptized as an unwitting new member into the community of the donor conceived. It’s an intense, tightly-knit one, though it would be months before I’d know that for myself. In the early days, I had enough to handle with unpacking the sudden dysphoria in my own head. There was […]

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UNCOVERING THE IDENTITY OF MY DONOR : PART 1

It’s been nearly three years to the day of learning that I am donor conceived, and not my father’s biological son. In that time, I have written extensively about most of my thoughts and experiences. That includes the cast of characters involved in the story, with special attention paid to my dad and sister, as […]

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PARENT’S RIGHTS VS. CHILD’S RIGHTS

The advent of spit-in-a-vile, mail order DNA tests has made the long-held notion of donor anonymity a relic of the past. But, it’s left scores of children in its wake who have substantive questions of identity. And for many, those questions are debilitating. I am part of several virtual support groups for donor conceived children, and it’s by and large not a happy forum.

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HOW A COUSIN BECOMES A COUSIN

I’ve gone to great lengths to apply innumerable coats of polish to about 75 percent of the words you’ve seen written in this blog since October 2019. But I’ve got to be honest ¬— that last cliché serving as evidence, this post is more an exercise in emotionally-fueled word vomit than it is a showcase […]

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DAD VS. DAD

In my DNA and sperm donation journey, I ended up on Miami’s FOX affiliate for an interview in December 2019. (Spoiler alert: It didn’t make me famous). But it granted me a format (video) and an audience to whom I could tell my story and the story of my father. Roughly 30 million people have […]

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THE AGONY OF INFERTILITY

Over the course of two years, in 2013 and 2014, I watched my best friend and his wife endure the pain and heartbreak of infertility issues. It was my first experience with infertility, even from a distance, with a couple I know up close. At first, they were candid about their ongoing attempts at natural […]

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AND NOW THERE ARE 7

I’d love to think of myself as a fortune teller in the DNA ancestry test world, because I could make some nice side money by accurately predicting the future. In my last post, I wrote with regard to the discovery of new siblings “…[you know] with a high degree of certainty that within six to […]

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THE ETHICAL CONUNDRUM OF DONOR WORLD

This is weird. Being donor conceived. Having five (and counting) half-siblings. Knowing with a high degree of certainty that within six to eight weeks of holiday gifting, you’ll probably find one or two more. Looking in the mirror and not knowing who gave you blue eyes — That is all weird. And yet, it’s all […]

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Me, my Uncles Robert and Jimmy, their wives, and my grandfather

EXPOSING A FAMILY SECRET

Memorial Day Weekend, 2019: I’ve always loved the idea of being a blogger, or of having a ‘lifestyle blog.’ Whatever the kids are calling it, I finally realized my ticket to storytelling — to being heard by the world — was via my ancestry search. Arriving at a place where I could say that out […]

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